Thursday, November 26, 2009

Criminals cause energy waste

Could it be argued that criminals do not help climate change?

I've just walked down my street at 1am. I did not see another person for the full 30 minutes. Yet everyone's porch lights were on, allbeit energy saving, serving as nothing more than a deterrent against criminals. Goodness knows how many kilowatt hours were used just to provide me with the ability to see everything in orange.

Are they fitting LED streetlights in certain places? Surely this sodium orange has had its day?

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Defra - are these your sausages sir? Shit radio ad

What is with the Defra "are these your sausages sir?" radio advert about smuggling meat and dairy products into the UK from other countries? Mark Heap is one of the voices.

I must have heard this advert several times A DAY on LBC for the last 3 YEARS.

Is this really the best way to spend tax-payers money? How many people smuggle sausages into the UK anyway?

I read on a forum that someone spoke to a Defra rep at a trade fair about smuggling sausages with relation to this omni-present radio commercial and the rep had no idea what they were talking about.

New Labour - New Britain.

Topping up my Three mobile broadband dongle

So, I need to top up my Three USB mobile broadband dongle. So I log in. The card that's on the account has expired, so I add my debit card. It warns me it will take £10 every time a new card is added. That's ok, 'cos I need to add £10 of credit.
Submit card.
"It takes 7 days to register a new debit card to be able to use it for top-ups. You can add a credit card if you like...".
OK, so I add my credit card - I need this topping up NOW for use TOMORROW.
"It takes 7 days to register a new credit card to be able to use it for top-ups".
So I walk to the newsagents to get a £10 top-up voucher.
I come back, activate it, then notice both my cards have now already been accepted, so I now have £30 on the account!
And they've added over 2,000 free text messages.
It's bloody crazy.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

New in November

I have just used a Lynx product for the first time since I was 11. Now I smell like a schoolboy.

It's only schoolboys who use Lynx isn't it? All these TV ads saying the Lynx 'effect' makes you irresistable to girls, but the average age of users is probably 13.

I calculated how much money I take home from work each weekday, and my silly spreadsheet was totally wrong. I manually worked it out to be about a quarter of what it said, and about a pound more than minimum wage. And there was me, swanning around thinking I was Simon Cowell! <errr errr> (family fortunes X noise)